Friday, August 3, 2012

something is taking shape

Thought I'd report in to report that there's not much to report. The novel is slow-going. I keep doing that thing where I start exploring an idea and then immediately second-guess it until I lose interest. It's probably a symptom of depression, which I've had periodic bouts with since I was a kid, but it's also part of the writing process, and easily the part I hate the most.

In her interview over at Cobalt, Jane Delury mentions a chemical that women secrete during childbirth that dulls memory, ostensibly so they forget the pain and continue having babies, and says that the same chemical must be released during novel revision. If that happens to me, I'm getting too much of it, because between projects it's like I forget everything I ever learned about writing and I have to essentially remind myself how it works whenever I start anything new. Something very similar happened after I finished Gouts of Angry Mist, so maybe it's just what happens after I write stuff that's particularly emotionally draining.

Because of this, I am awed by people like my friend Jessica McHugh, who must have a perpetual motion machine in her head that just churns out ideas and inspiration all the time (I just started one of her books and it's a fun read so far). I don't know how they do it, and I can't get my brain to work at any pace faster than sluggish, it seems.

Or maybe this is kinda normal and American artists are just neurotic about how hard they think they should be working because any idle moments in their lives contribute to the stereotype that artists are just lazy and trying to do an end-run around the Protestant work ethic that defines our workforce, often to its own detriment. Who knows, really. I'm just fastballing here.

What I should be doing is going for a walk, but I pulled a muscle in my foot (how does that even HAPPEN) so I'll find something to read instead. Carry on.


  1. I just want to quit my day job really fucking badly. :)

  2. THC reacts with the same neural receptors as the birth drug.

  3. This sounds like a fairly accurate description of my writing process.